There are those of us who choose to heal. We choose to move forward and leave the hurt in the past. We choose a better way of life. We deliberately seek the help we need and make intentional choices that add value to our lives. The future is ours. Because the past will never live again.
You must make a choice. To take the steps in healing or use your pain as an excuse to be hurtful towards ourselves, or others. both physical and mental anguish can be devastating. It would be nice to believe that nobody wants to live in pain. And yet there are those among us that revel in it. They like to compare their pain to others. Thinking that they are the only ones that know the true meaning of pain. They like to use their pain as an excuse to not do something, or usually as an excuse to continue to do something. Whether it be drug abuse, alcohol, or treating people with disrespect.
They don’t want to take any steps in healing. They don’t want anything to take away their “handicap”, for that will not excuse them from the rest of the population.
They dwell on it. They talk about it daily. Some even thrive on their misfortune. It is a dysfunctional way to live and can be a sickness in itself.
The pain is real. Some physical. Some emotional. But they are so accustomed to living with it, that they may fear what their life would be like without it. That people would expect more from them than they currently are able to do. Expectations are not pleasant from any angle. They are the reason behind a lot of unnecessary anxiety. We live in a society that worries way too much about others and their expectations of us.
Fear and anxiety are real. And everyone can agree how crippling they can be. But to deliberately be an asshole because of your past, or present trauma is unacceptable. No one has earned the right to cause damage to another human being. NO ONE.
I will not be an enabler and will probably call you out on your bullshit. We all have the ability to change our attitude. Every one of us. We all have bad days, and yes…for some more than just a day. But how you treat others always matters. You will not get a hall pass from me.
Does that make me a bitch? Possibly, but I’d like to call it the “I see through your bullshit” Syndrome. It comes from being the one in pain. But, also from being someone’s punching bag. Grow up. Be an adult. Reteach yourself some proper social etiquette. Or better yet, how to be a kind human.
I pray that no one has to suffer alone. But if you are not a good human, I guarantee you will be alone. Because no one will want to be near you. No one will want to visit you. And after a while, they will no longer want to console you either. You cannot heal a person who uses their pain as an excuse to hurt others.
If you find yourself in this situation. Please, get the therapy and medical attention that you need to ease your body and soul. No one expects you to suffer unnecessarily. Make a choice to take the steps needed. Before you drive everyone that loves you away.
The Musings Of An Angry Woman 